Tuesday, August 12, 2014

2014 R16-20 Blue Girl Grabs lead by the Gonads

As we race towards a Collingwood-free finals series yippee! (thats for @the_tony) rounds 16 to 20 saw some twists to the various Uglybustards ladders - struggling to keep track there are so many these days. As a result and after much Broo-fuelled deliberations, to reward pure tipping skill the Board of Uglybustards in all its generosity has decided to award podium prizes for the Standard ladder as well as the prizes already available for the Sam Griggs Joker Ladder and Margin Ladder. However the prize money remains with the Joker ladder. And of course we reserve the right to change our minds once the collective Board sobers up.

But cheer up Uglybustards, an added bonus for next week is the jackpot didn't go off yet again thanks to yours truly tipping against my beloved Blue Baggers and round 21 sees a veritable fortune of $35 up for grabs!

All this and more in your Round 16-20 Uglybustards Update (next year there will be just the one round 1-GF update)...

The steady, rigid, calm and poised Flopalot maintains his lead in the "Sam Griggs" Joker Ladder but has had some scary moments in recent weeks where the 2 jokers used since the last Uglybustards Update almost backfired disastrously with a round of upsets, leaving the comp wide open (which was the aim of the Sam Griggs inspired joker ladder in the first place).

One disadvantage of the joker ladder is that its #$%&^ near impossible to write a decent report after a few sherbets as its so hard to track back how many jokers have been used.

Pre-dinner drinks at an Uglybustards Board meeting

Pretty sure that early pacesetter zenben still has 2 jokers left and is well in it 18 pts behind the Flop, who appears to have one left in his belt. Current 2nd & 3rd Anthony Aiello and stanleymarsh seem to have both shot their bolt early with all arsenal fired, while 4th placed Waimea Heights Primary School old boy PETELEWIS has also used up all his jelly beans. 5th and 6th placed Craig Nettlebeck and Amy Jones are in the same boat (metaphorically speaking) and in fact I have to trawl down the list to 30th placed Lazybastard who appears to be the highest placed punter to have a joker left, in fact he's that 'ckn lazy he hasn't even used one, and is most likely oblivious to the fact that there has been a joker option all year.

Let's take a look at the standard ladder if I can work out how to still access it on the footytips site.
Hang on, here's one I prepared earlier:  Standard Ladder.

Round 16

That is quite telling as Flopalot has a clear 3 point lead over zenben who has another clear 3 point lead over a bunch separated by only 2 points going back to 15th! While the Flop & zen have clearly been the 2 star performers and will clean up with multiple prizes there's a logjam for 3rd with PETELEWIS leading the pack, right down to the mighty Val WOOF Perovic in 15th.

Dual Uglybustards titleholder, doyen of tipping and stalwart of veterans Arnold Layne has lost the margin ladder lead after leading from rounds 10 to 18, overtaken by the ultimate strategist in this dept, Blue Girl, who hasn't tipped for at least a dozen rounds and has now led the comp for 2 weeks.   However, Blue Girl has made a major error in her well planned strategy by forgetting to enter the prize pool.  This puts the unassuming Rod Tilt Carter in top spot with maybe a bit more money for the neck straightening op, ahead of Arnold the cunning linguist, with John Longmire obviously too preoccupied with the Swans to enter the prize pool in 4th, leaving The Monstrator himself Mik Barley on the Prize Pool Podium.

Round 17

Meanwhile, the Trivia comp continues it's exciting run to a non-fulfilling conclusion as that dirty rotten muddafkn cheating biartch farkn cheaing muddafkkr and Singaporean debutante the muddaaaarfkcn  Muddafkkr holds the lead with a round in hand 207/240, while I've stumbled into 2nd, yes thats me Uglybustard on 199/250. At least I'm in front of gonadbreath 195/240 who has a round of gonads in his hand. To join the Trivia comp, login to footytips.com.au then go to http://www.footytips.com.au/tipping/afl/trivia.

Round 18

That's it until the eve of the finals series folks. Don't forget your tips for round 21, and remember, forget about tattslotto this week cos there's an amazing $35 (yes that is thirty 'ckn five dollars ladeez & gentz & not forgettng uglybustardz) up for grabs for a full card pick which will also net you the cardboard flavoured hungry jacks whoooooooorrrrrrrrpeerrrrr!!! So get yer tips in nice an' early. So I get the late mail.

Round 19

"I'll be buck" as Arnie says with yet another riveting Uglybustards Update in R23 on the eve of the finals, where I'll be discussing my $501 bet of $100 last week on the Tigers to win the flag on the TAB (sucked in youse non believers).

In the meantime....don't concern yourselves too much with all these youtube vids interrupting my brilliant dialogue.  It's pussing doon hailstones, I'm out of beer, the bottlo closes in 20 mins and is a 19 min run away.
Go yoooouuuuuse Uglybaaaaaaaaaaaastaaaaaaaaaaaaaaards!!

and remember...

Support Juvenile Diabetes Research!!! (you utter, utter, utter bustards)
Vale Robin Williams

Round 20

Disclaimer: 'Tis the work of an Ugly Bustard


The boot said...

Honestly, you must have been on mescaline or something to have written that epic sports report. I think I might have a few jokers left so it's full throttle towards another Swannies flag - Buddy kicking the winning goal after the siren to get us over the line by a point!

Nguyen Hieu said...

fuck u ..you cnt.. i will kick ur arse u .....

where is the prize money for the trivia comp......

when i win.... uglybustards should inauguate a trophy..... the mudda fkkrs cunp

and also im pakistan you fkn shit 4 brain loser of a tipping comp

ps .. can u send me some mescaline.... i will send you some ludes

Uglybustard said...

You're in Pakistan now ?? How'd u get across border

Uglybustard said...

Mmmmm mescaline... Taking littlebastard to saints satdee

Ugly Bustard said...

hey boot.
also booked in swans tigers at homebusch city limits with tina turner and the littlebustard.
c u there